Facing the Truth: How to Know When Your Marriage Is Over
Marriage is a lifelong roller coaster, but sometimes, the ride stops short. Mixed emotions, anger, and resentment can all cloud your judgement and make the truth difficult to see. So, how do you know when your marriage is over? At Buckhead Family Law, we understand relationships are hard complicated, and most importantly, uniquely personal, but there many signs that let you know that it is time to wave the white flag and take proactive steps to initiate the divorce process. If you are still uncertain and considering whether or not your marriage is truly over, take your time.
There are a few things you’ll want to think about before filing for divorce in Georgia. Under Georgia law, you can file for divorce under the “irretrievably broken” standard which means your marriage is over, as you are unable or unwilling to continue living as a married couple with your spouse. This is generally considered a “no-fault” ground for divorce.
Here are a few of the telltale signs we see emerge most often when a marriage is ending:
The Intimacy is Non-existent
Intimacy is more than sex – intimacy is being able to sit together and not say anything but still feel like you are “together.” After years (or even just months) or marriage, if you are sitting together and but you feel alone, there could be a bigger problem. While this shouldn’t be the only determining factor weighed to decide if your marriage is over, it can be a huge red flag that something is off. Of course, although obvious, not having sex regularly isn’t a good thing either. Every marriage has its “dry spells,” but not wanting or seeking intimacy with each other is a sign that your relationship is fading.
You Don’t Miss Your Spouse When You’re Apart
“Absence makes the heart grow fonder,” right? Of course, it’s healthy to be apart from your spouse sometimes and have your own life, hobbies, and friends. You shouldn’t feel like the two of you have to be connected at the hip 24/7. However, when you’re apart for an extended period, if you don’t miss them just a little bit, it could be a sign that trouble is brewing in paradise.
Couples Therapy Didn’t Work
Most couples don’t love couples therapy, but it does, in fact, work when both parties are truly dedicated to rekindling the fire and fixing what’s broken. If you haven’t tried couples therapy and you want to fight for your marriage, it is well worth your time. However, it takes two to tango – so, if your spouse isn’t willing to fight for your marriage, you should take that as a troubling sign.
On the other hand, if you’ve tried couples therapy and it really hasn’t worked for the two of you, it may be a sign that what has gone wrong is irreparable.
You Cannot Reach Your Milestones or Goals with Them by Your Side
What are your goals in life? To be a parent? To start a specific career? To live somewhere exciting? If you are not a team and your spouse cannot help you achieve those goals (or, at the very least, happily hop on for the ride), then you may need to find someone who can. It’s good to have goals, bother separately and joint, but the key is to support each other in your individual goals and dreams.
The Arguing Never Ceases
If one argument seems to just flow into another without fail, your marriage may be in trouble. If you are arguing all the time and you are afraid to even open your mouth, lest it turn into another argument, then divorce may begin to look like an attractive option. Every couple fights, but you should be able to talk through the simple things. Having an occasional argument isn’t grounds for divorce, but if your marriage is a constant battle ground (even around others), you may need to move on.
Someone Was/Is Abusive
Abuse is a tragic, unforgettable moment in time that can never be erased. Abuse should not be tolerated, period. Whether it was verbal, emotional, physical, or sexual abuse, you should immediately remove yourself from the situation and from the marriage. Do not ever give someone, even your spouse, a second chance to abuse you. Your safety and health, and that of your children must be a priority. Apart from a divorce, there are many resources available for survivors of domestic violence.
Someone Was Unfaithful
Infidelity can cut like a knife and tear a marriage apart faster than anything else. It is really difficult to move beyond an affair or even a single act of infidelity, as it breaks a trust that can often never be repaired. Whether it was a purely physical or emotional relationship, it may be impossible for the other spouse to ever move past this kind of transgression. Someone will always have suspicions or second thoughts and, unfortunately, someone who cheats is likely to cheat again. If you are struggling with your partner’s infidelity, this is a major sign that your marriage is over, and a new path awaits.
There’s Hope: You’re Ready for A New Chapter
Sometimes, you just know that you’re ready to start over, to begin a new chapter. We know a lot about ourselves and when push comes to shove, deep down, we all know what is truly best for us. If you’ve reached a point where you cannot even imagine happiness or good times in your marriage, you need to consider filing for divorce in Georgia. This can be a pivotal point in your life where you choose happiness, make positive changes, grow, and embark upon a new, exciting journey. Rather than focusing on the ending of your marriage, see the opportunity for a new beginning.
What Do You Do When Your Marriage Is Over in Georgia?
If you are thinking about filing for divorce in Georgia, there are several steps you need to take. The most important one is to find a lawyer who can help you to navigate these unchartered waters and help you move your life forward. The lawyers at Buckhead Family Law are here to assist you and help this be a positive turning point for your family. Schedule a consultation by calling at 404-600-1403.